Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Heartbreakers and dreamtakers


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Took a little time out to make an atc for my Paper Traders yahoo group monthly lottery. The dude and the life expectancy chart are packing tape image transfers and the word is a Marah Johnson rub-on. I used an old pink valentine scrapbook paper wrapped base of chipboard that I had left over from last February. The image transfers were made from junk mailer images. I painted quinacridone red, azo gold over the paper and then payne's grey on the edges.
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I love how it turned out and it was fun to make an atc again since it has been a while. I hope whoever wins the lottery likes it, too!

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So, we are reading Kelly Rae Roberts' book, Taking Flight, in a study group workshop over at On the Wing ning. I absolutely love Kelly Rae's art and her style. Kelly Rae's book isn't just art and techniques. It's also about her journey to get to where she's at now, and the book deals a lot with helping the reader do that.
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I had written a big old post here about all the problems I was having following her exercises and study questions so far. And I have since removed it because it was just a little too angry for my comfort. I did a lot of thinking last night and figured out where all the anger was coming from. This book is for someone who still has an open playdate with fulfilling her dreams.
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And frankly, I don't. My window of opportunity has passed, partly because of my age and my circumstances, but mostly because of my chronic illness. And I've spent 3 years working through all of that and getting to a pretty great happy place. Just know, it was a long hard trip uphill, okay? Then this book comes along and screws that all to hell in my head. Loverly.
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So, I can either avoid the book or I can reflect back on dreams I had that I no longer can fulfill and maybe record how I've coped and adjusted. I'm tentatively going to try the latter and see how it goes. But it's painful, cuz I had me some good dreams. And stay tuned, cuz if I have to revisit it, I'm dragging you with me. ;-)
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